The weather... is lovely today. Sleep worthy... and definitely cools the soul.
Had a good sleep, though still tired.
Last night, Chris called me after work, and practicurly spoke with me till I reached home. She and JQ have been having problems for some time now, coz he had a crush on another gurl and told her and it really broke the trust between them and all. They're older than I am, and are very serious already. But the thing is, hes been trying so hard to make it up to her, and I know how hard it is for her, but it's not like we all dont have our short comings and failings. Neither am I saying that he is wrong. He definitely is. But after listening to how everything has been, I know that it's not like he doesnt care anymore.
Chris, is gg thru the same depression stage I went thru a few months back. Angry with herself, with him, and not giving herself that chance to trust again, not so much him. Shes aware hes there for her, but she shunning everyone out of her life, esp him. And yet she knows thts the one thing she doesnt want. I told her, if she continues shunning him, hes really gonna start believing it, coz of the state shes in, and leave. The arguments can be that then so be it, but is tht what she really wants? IF she still wants to marry him, and if he still has the mentality of marryng her, then dont make the situation worse. She's already had alone time, she should really sit down and talk to him, to help her, not to drive her to IMH. She said to me that no one can knock sense into her, then I started getting upset, and told her, well, im not one of the friends whoose gonna sit back and agree on that. Shes been cooping up at home or in the library and everything...
I got upset enuff. I understand how Chelle got angry with me that day, and basically it just stems from our own experiences and not wanting another friend to make the same mistakes or take the longer route when they can hear it from us. And the way I see it, shes gonna lose him if she perists this way. I told her this is what Charles said to me like a few days after espy gig in march. And it happened sooner than we both thought. Its rubbish, thinkign the guy will tolerate everything. They are all only but human. They coudl go out with anyone else. What makes us think they'll stay and put up with shit till we get hitched? veen in marriage I was telling Chris, it shudnt be that way. Problems like depression, more than often, first drives the parties apart, rather than closer. I shared with her abt my parents, and she understood it.
I was upset enough to break down a bit, because as I spoke to her, I really was so afraid she was digging up her own grave, and that fear and the fact tht she wont listen, started to pain me, and I started crying for a bit, because what was accumulating in me, esp at that point was alot of regret,knowing so well, alot of time that I cant turn back anymore, that has caused me to have lost him. And so Chris, please.. heal and give hi one last chance. Coz u noe that u love him, and so does he. One crush, is way better than many crushes. He shudnt have told u, thats what u feel,yes. It hurts like fuck. But, at least he told u... Dont wait till he walks off, and when they do, they will never come back again.
Ok.. take care...
So, anyway, ive not made any mention fo the fact that Chelle spoke to me. I will not write anything abt it here. But.. she scolded well.. and knocked sense into me well. And shes right... so Ive made my decision....
ahh this is good.. chris just msg.. and she says yea.. he sacrifices alot for her.. given up hobbies, wants to spend the rest of his life with her... not sure if he can give their future family a gd life and all... i think shes starting to wake up... im so glad...
Anyways.. im off to arrange for more interviews...
istillloveyouevenifivegivenup
Had a good sleep, though still tired.
Last night, Chris called me after work, and practicurly spoke with me till I reached home. She and JQ have been having problems for some time now, coz he had a crush on another gurl and told her and it really broke the trust between them and all. They're older than I am, and are very serious already. But the thing is, hes been trying so hard to make it up to her, and I know how hard it is for her, but it's not like we all dont have our short comings and failings. Neither am I saying that he is wrong. He definitely is. But after listening to how everything has been, I know that it's not like he doesnt care anymore.
Chris, is gg thru the same depression stage I went thru a few months back. Angry with herself, with him, and not giving herself that chance to trust again, not so much him. Shes aware hes there for her, but she shunning everyone out of her life, esp him. And yet she knows thts the one thing she doesnt want. I told her, if she continues shunning him, hes really gonna start believing it, coz of the state shes in, and leave. The arguments can be that then so be it, but is tht what she really wants? IF she still wants to marry him, and if he still has the mentality of marryng her, then dont make the situation worse. She's already had alone time, she should really sit down and talk to him, to help her, not to drive her to IMH. She said to me that no one can knock sense into her, then I started getting upset, and told her, well, im not one of the friends whoose gonna sit back and agree on that. Shes been cooping up at home or in the library and everything...
I got upset enuff. I understand how Chelle got angry with me that day, and basically it just stems from our own experiences and not wanting another friend to make the same mistakes or take the longer route when they can hear it from us. And the way I see it, shes gonna lose him if she perists this way. I told her this is what Charles said to me like a few days after espy gig in march. And it happened sooner than we both thought. Its rubbish, thinkign the guy will tolerate everything. They are all only but human. They coudl go out with anyone else. What makes us think they'll stay and put up with shit till we get hitched? veen in marriage I was telling Chris, it shudnt be that way. Problems like depression, more than often, first drives the parties apart, rather than closer. I shared with her abt my parents, and she understood it.
I was upset enough to break down a bit, because as I spoke to her, I really was so afraid she was digging up her own grave, and that fear and the fact tht she wont listen, started to pain me, and I started crying for a bit, because what was accumulating in me, esp at that point was alot of regret,knowing so well, alot of time that I cant turn back anymore, that has caused me to have lost him. And so Chris, please.. heal and give hi one last chance. Coz u noe that u love him, and so does he. One crush, is way better than many crushes. He shudnt have told u, thats what u feel,yes. It hurts like fuck. But, at least he told u... Dont wait till he walks off, and when they do, they will never come back again.
Ok.. take care...
So, anyway, ive not made any mention fo the fact that Chelle spoke to me. I will not write anything abt it here. But.. she scolded well.. and knocked sense into me well. And shes right... so Ive made my decision....
ahh this is good.. chris just msg.. and she says yea.. he sacrifices alot for her.. given up hobbies, wants to spend the rest of his life with her... not sure if he can give their future family a gd life and all... i think shes starting to wake up... im so glad...
Anyways.. im off to arrange for more interviews...
istillloveyouevenifivegivenup
posted by melissa at 9/15/2006 02:41:00 PM
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