Thursday, Oct 5th 2006

Another tough day. Woke up, rushed out, and got to work early for once.
Quite proud of myself for that. Damn damn damn tired today, coz the period was draining me alot too. That added to the lack of sleep and flu.
I was happy to go to sleep after talking to Charles about the gig last night, though. And I sorta sorted it out again, and I think he's right that I should
put in a few new songs, and I think though I lack energy now, somehow,
it'll work out fine, and it'll be a hopefully good gig still. It oughta be.

As usual, the mornings always see me wishing i cud take a half day to sleep in,
or a full day even. This is really what I feel every morning I wake,
without fail. Very tortourous feeling. And Im not exaggerating. Really.
How does one go on doing this for ten, twenty, thirty yrs on end??
I hope I'll get more used to this, and that the love for the kids will keep me going.

I was tired to the extent that I needed to somehow nap during work today.
And that was while trying to solve a damn heuristics question.
I honestly tell u, I cant solve heuristics. Ive tried very hard already.
Janessea is gd at maths plus she has five yrs experience.

After work, which took FOREVER to end today, I waited for 32 or 40
to get to bedok, and knocked out on the bus. The temptation to call off
tuition was HUGE, but, the determination to go teach my kid made me
shrug tht thought off quickly. I freshened up at macs toilet, took a light
dinner,
and went to teach him. His english is as good as someone whoose never
learnt before. Hes playful and rather lazy, but quite adorable.
His mother is really nice, and Ive gained her trust tonight.
So AHH, was quite satisfied after tuition. Felt good about myself,
u noe. heh

But that found me back home, totally pooped out. BUT! I showered,
ate again, and ironed up my clothes. I practised some vocals,
and sorted out some gig stuff. Now online, and i can say my checklist
for the day is completed. GOOD.

I just really need this flu to go off. Its REALLLLY getting in my way.
Im sorrie for the numerous complains. I just need to let it all out.
Im working over the weekend too, and have to squeeze in jam and
even cantoring on sunday ... WHOA.

As dory said " Keep swimming, keep swimming"

And I just try to remember Im seriusly one of many souls out there
slogging their lives out too. At least Im doing something right.
And the people closest to me, and around me, are all slogging hard too.
That, just them in my thoughts, keeps me going for myself and for them.
Yea, sure it aint easy.

And how could I forget... Happy Birthday,.. wei.... I hope u had a gd day,
and that whoever u hoped remembered, remembered. Yea.


You know guys, something came to my realisation today- for some reason,
the closest guy friends Ive had, who turned out to be the most impt,
other than himself, were all his close friends. You all know there was
his once-best friend I was very close to, and then i remember finding it
really interesting that not long after he disappeared, Charles came along
into our lives. And I just cudnt believe how nicely it all fell in place.
And i remembger comparing sort of, and noticing similarities bwtween them
and all three of them as well. And somehow, after all these months,
I realises Charles is a character combination of them both. Hahaa.
How interesting. Mentioned this to Harri before, and she kinda agrees too.

And though Edwin, or Teoxu, or Linus and I are not tht close,
we all became gd friends and all of these guys are great individuals.
How come? How did he end up making such gd friends?
And the lady friends he has, are all really real as well. Geesh.
I dont get it.

Anyway. Happy 20th.