...in her head again.......

Woke up and practised guitar and piano. I need to work on my playing for both the instruments alot more. I have three new originals, which makes my nineth, tenth and elevnth composition. HAHA. But technically it's 6 done, and two in progess and three still left as proses.

I went to watch koff koff at earshot just now. Coincidentally, he is Law's friend, and that would mean he's Jeff's friend as well. Jeff has grown fatter! Hahahah! And so so coincidentally, law's other friend who came along, brought a girl, who is his gf, and that girl happens to be my school senior from KC! Wow. SMALL WORLD MAN. So it turned out that the handful of us who were there all knew each other thru each other. LOL.

I met Eldred for a bit at kopi bean tea leaf at douby, and then we made our way back when they were closing.

I'm on a self-angry mode now. Really. I'm close to self-destrusting as well. It's like it's all bottled up inside, and i'm refusing to let it out. Keep feeling like doing smth bad to myself. and it so happens Eld gave me funny ideas unknowingly. But of coz I wont la. BAH.

Walked alot today. From earshot to rendevous, from his bus stop back home. And WOW, I even bought him the wrong mopiko. Im so damn fucking useless. But the walk was good. I really needed to be alone and just WALK it out.

Things are better with Pat now.

mel, so blardy mothet fucking useless.


I really need you. But i musnt be selfish.