and she dreams again...

It's realli painful--the way we were so close one week...like as if you pretended...and for the last two weeks...you can walk pass me...whether you were rushing off...or simply leaving to go home...and not even say hello..or turn to smile and acknowledge i exist. It hurts, since i look forward to this day during the week so much. But how strange itis, that when I see you, I myself try not to stay around you too much. Is this some after effect of our awkward closeness that week? Is it? Is it my smses, my emails, and helping you to promote your work online? Everytime you wouldn't ans. I know im not the only one, but the way you choose to be warm and cold whenever you feel like it hurts. I don't stay around you so much, simply because i'm afraid. Maybe you'll be umcomfortable, maybe i'll look like an "extra' around all of you...like i shouldn't be standing there...in case i make it too obvious tht it's only because you're there. I feel so dumb, looking forward to a day, and suddenly when i'm in thattime itself, as much as i treasure it, I become upset instead. And now, sundays are like the end of the week i don't wish end...it just becomes worse.

What is it?