and she dreams again...

I love my new layout. =) Now i feel like writing here more again. This week has really been awesome. This kinda thing doesn't happen everyday, and certainly, to have a great WEEK is something to be very greatful for. Thank you Lord.

Sean, don't know if you are actually reading it, but thank you too.=) You made my week even better! ^__^

I slept in the whole day. Haha. twelve hours straight. yes, it's another one of those days! =)
A day of slacking is wonderful. But, i may want to get a job. See how. Going to penang for a week from nov 28th to Oct 5th just before school starts. Hmm, actually, right now, I wana start listening to all my cds again, and memorising lyrics. I realised i become quite "handicapped" when I don't memorise lyrics, then I can't jam and perform any songs. That is really crucial. So, gonna start doing that again, and have songs ready at any time! =) This is also coz I intend to record demos soon, and send out to various companies. meanwhile I hope Peter, my producer, gets me more recording projects.

I'm determined, more than ever now, to make it big one day. One day not too far from now. I'm definitely gonna take vocal lessons again, but I'm not sure who to go to. I want something substantial, a programme that i'll definitely improve while taking the lessons. I'm researching on that.

man, i'm damn sleepy. Gonna stop writing because the english is terrible. See ya all!

and she dreams again...

Seriosuly, I do hope you'll call me one day...and let me know i'm forgiven.

and she dreams again...

Start a new chapter, with a new layout. I got sick, sick, sick of the old one. Suddenly found it too childish. I have no idea why. So, here is something simpler, nice, plesant and easy for navigation.

hope you peeps like it. :) Shoot is finally over. YESHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Away from school it is. Away from everyone. No la. Still gotta take care of post production accouts now and all. But, now i'm gonna go cut my hair a bit, go for auditons abit, and get a job. hang out with mum even. AND.... of coz!!!! hang out with my darlingz friends...;p *maukx*.

hahahaha

see ya all.

and she dreams again...

Today, thursday, was another happy day!!!

I went to KTV with Christine, Faith, Hanwen, and Xinyi to celebrate Faith's bday! Aww...the girl looks so sweet today ;p And even Christine was wearing this mager short mini skirt! man!! hanwen looks good with his new style too~~ Happy birthday darling Faith : )

It was really really nice to meet up with them again after sooo long!! The last time? February! I missed them aload since...

After that, I dropped by taka to eat and see korkor at work...then i went off to church for cantor meeting. Weiyi came even though he didn't need to. It was nice catching up again, and it was quite funny really. Big Sam said we shall not sit together again, coz we talked too much! hahaha...but really what other tiem do we have to chat? Jared came late!! *bleah* I seem better with my cantoring. i seem to have some sort of new found confidence. i dont know why.

I hope I'll be taking vocal lessons from Keith Chun. His daughter, Sharolyn, has some mad talent! Have no idea what singapore idol judges hear. freaking deaf. All , listen people, all the good singers are NOT in the competition. Incompetence of lousy judges, AND good singers just dont join idol competitions. Go to pubs, you'll find them.

Today as great. : ) Tis week is some magical weel for me. :p

Love ya all~

i've started a new chapter of my life!!! That's fast!

and she dreams again...

I have been blogging and uploading photos and everything on multiply! im so sorry ive abandoned this place!! Ok, I'm gonna try and paset eveything here! hahaha...;p There are alot of entries so I'll just put some more important and not so private ones up..kekee

Wednesday-27th oct.

My Christmas Album--Pls Do Support!
Dear All,I am extremely excited to announce that the Christmas album I was busy recording in June will be available in all catholic churches from this sunday onwards. The album is titled" The Best Of Traditional Christmas Songs" . The producer, Mr Peter Chua, offered me a chance to sing with him, and two of his other session singers, Michelle Ng and Jeffrey Forseka. there are twelve songs in the album and I have two solos in it. ( One is a whole song and another half a song). The two songs are : O Come, O Come emmanuel, and Silent Night. We spent some time recording, and now it is finally ready for your listening pleasure! Please do support us! it is a very nice Christmas album! Go to any catholic church bookshop. it will be available there. I will like to thank my choir's music director, Mr Samuel Seow, who reccomended me to Mr Peter Chua, the producer of this album. Thank you very much. Do support!! God bless everyone!Sincerely,Melissa : )

This week has been awesome!
Three Nights in a row i had such a good time!! Thank you Lord, thank you soo much!!Monday Night--My most talked about Gigs I attended with meliza, Harry, jayne, cheryl two nights ago. Took some crazy pics.Tuesday(aka yesterday)-Had dinner at al ameens with Chua, kalif, Norainah, Sheng, Vicki, Wayne, and had a great time with vicki after tht before heading home. Took some crazy pics.Wednesday(aka tonight)- My family and I went to Actors Pubto collect my Xmas CD from my producer. He and the rest of his session singers were gathered together for a jam session, or a fun night : ). We had no intention of staying initially, but we stayed till 3+am. We jammed and jammed and jammed! i had aload of fun, singing, dancing, playing the drums and all! I had a really good time together with the rst of the singers and musicians, just jamming away every song we could think of!. hahaha=) I did get a bit dizzy at first, coz i was drinking and dancing at the same time...but it went off. Haha at one point, i was going off key so much!. It's a nice pub no matter: )Lord, Thank you for three great days! I was feeling terribly sick (as usual) when I woke up, but luckily it went off. ;p

Tuesday-Oct 26th
-edited for privacy sake to others-
Dinner at A-Ameens
Guys,Thanks for the invite for dinner today. Vicki and I had some nice time together after that. Will upload with other photos...Vicki, thanks for such a nice time today as well. Don't be down anymore about it. What's done is done gurl.

Monday-25th oct

Barnone, The Night Out,Ronin, Electrico
Last Night, i was at bar none for my friend's band's gig, along with another band.Photos im uploading. I had alot of fun, and the bands were awesome!! Ronin is my friend's band, and they've come a LONG way! They've got their EP out already, and it's good shite!! Electrico played alongside them last night, and they were just as good, with their songs on p10's no one now! Check them out! I really really had alot alot of fun! Check out my friend's band, Ronin, at : http://www.roninriot.com/and Electrico at:http://www.electricomusic.com/home/default.htmlElectrico is no one now, and Ronin is releasing thier full length album beginning of next year. To all the people who didn't have faith in them, stuff it in yr face! hahaha =)I'm very proud of them. I really had a good time last night. Thank you harry, Meliza, jJayne, Cheryl, and Harry's friends for coming with me. Let's go clubbing again!!!!! : )Bro, than you so much for letting me still be a special part of ronin. I lovr you guys so much. You have reminded me once again, that if IS POSSIBLE to fulfil my dreams even though we look different.

For the rest of the stuff, like photos, if you wana see, go to my multiply page at
http://melissaliaw.multiply.com

and she dreams again...

I've been updating in multiply.com...coz i got my account unfrozen finally! Am rather addicted to it at the moment! hahahaha...sorri guys!!!

Come look for me at : http://melissaliaw.multiply.com/

On friendster, I've updated my profiel as well. But it's the same as multiply...yuupz...almost lah...

gd nite everyone!

and she dreams again...

Second day of producxtion over. =) Not bad, I must say, though there was some delay during production time itself, we managed to finish everything we targeted for today. ;p Amin and Jimmy helped out today, coz Rey has been down with gastric flu these two days. I'm pretty happy with everything so far. Our talents are wonderful people. Ah Fai has been very generous and kind to us. I definitely wana treat him or compensate him after production. ;p

I went to catch 2046 after production earlier this evening. Although I was very tired, and pretty ill, i couldnt wait any longer to watch the film. it was worth my while. You know how I have always ranked The Hours as my favourite film, because of the story, the editing, the scripting, and the whole style of the film. It's artdy, but also very tasteful. Heh. Likewise, my favourite sort of books like jeneatte Winterson's Power Book. It's just the way the novel or script is written. The writers' abilities to express themselves with the English language, to create such imagery in your mind, is not a gift everyone posesses.

I fell in love with the Power Book, Virgin Suicides, The Hours, and now tonite, I fell In love with the chinese version of The Hours: 2046. it is , yes, another love story, but it definitely has it's own way of telling itself to you. The scripting was powerful. The confusion was hard to handle in my state, but the substance was so good. Zhang Zhiyi did a very comendable performance in this film. She is indeed a very good actress. With co actors, tony leong, gong li, faye wong, who also carried off the characters very convincingly, the film was yummy.

this is smth I remember from it: "Two persons could be meant for each other, but they meet at the wrong time. Either too early or too late, they become incompatible. "

"she kept asking him: Arent there some things that never change? He knew immediately what she meant."

"he wanted to give the story a happier ending. But he sat there for 100 hours, and he just couldnt' write out a happier ending. she liked the story very much, but the ending was much too depressing."

"Memories, are traces...of tears. We stay in 2046, because it never changes. The people who go there, never come back. "

"I needed an answer, so on her body, I tried to find the answers I'd been searching for, for so long."

"Maybe she didn't reply, not because she as delayed, or slow, but maybe simply because she didn't like you, or that she loved some one else."

"since we were together, i'd stopped bringing other men back. can you stop bringing other women back? "

"I just need company. So, I asked you out. So, I'm just borrowing some company. So then, am I borrowing you, or you borrowing me?"

"Everyone needs comfort. Esp on Christmas eve, people usually need alittle bit more warmth. i didn't get it this Christmas eve, but it doesn't matter."

"I came here last Christmas eve, just hoping to look for you. i dont know why that nite, i missed you especailly."

"She wanted to be with the japanese guy, but her father refused. Since then i keep hearing her talking to herself."

..............................

I think I had two persons I loved. Now I have none. It was you baby, *W*, but I gave up, coz it hurt too much after 2+ years. I can't keep it in anymore, and I can't continue coz it's too painful, not being able to love you.

then when i closed that chapter, something fesh opened. it stole my entire heart. I could no longer look back at the previous chapter the same way. *W, our chapter still has a bookmark, but it's a bookmakr I won't touch again, until you want me to open it again. This new chapter, *N, belongs to you. I can't explain, but womean have sixth sense, and I know, I've already lost you, completely. You just walkd in and sneeked out of my life. Why? I wish I could be given a chance. It's such a waste, on both our parts. I truly feel there could have been something more. I've fallen in "like" with you. I just kep re-playing the short memories I have of you. I miss you very very very much. There's nothing I can do about it except write it here, and you won't even see this. I miss you Nel. Can I call?......

and she dreams again...

First day of production...and i had a bad terrible headache due to the scorching sun!! man, it was freaking hot! The scene went pretty olrite. Cleared almost everything...dunnoe what i wana say...nothing much....except...SLY RAWKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! go sly!

i miss ya.

and she dreams again...

I had dinner with my godbro, nick earlier : ) We ate at pizza hut!! yes, finally after ten months, i stepped into the the food place I was SOO sick of! hehehe...man, the food taste damn good and it feels sooo much better!! They have some new dishes like meat balls! WHOOOoo! It's real nice
Real happy also, coz my abang gurlfren, hahahaha, *butch la*, yan aka ah qil was there!!!! my gosh miss her loads!!!! She seems to have moved on with life. I'm very happy for her. She was my role model at work. She taught me all the expertise of the job. I truly love her for tht. I went to the bedok branch. Finally. I did it. Im happier. I hope one day i'd step into ps pizza hut, and do the same. Right now, i can't. funny how these things work.

But today, I'm also sadder. he said " We're just frens yah..."...yah...i understand. thanks for telling me...coz...then at least i dun keep the hopes up...it makes things easier as far as "knowing "goes...it sure beats not telling and i keep wondering what HE is thinking...but of coz it hurts...the same way it hurts when HE didnt say a word till today. But tht ive given up. but now, he has taken my heart away, and i cant do anything abt it coz we're just frens to him. I just wan you to know ...tht i miss your voice, i miss the songs you sang to me over the phone...I miss the way we used to chat. i miss yr concern for me...i miss the daily smses...i miss yr calls...I miss the way you joked abt how your jacket is so useful. i miss the 130 songs you'll scheem thru on yr mp3 player. Im sorri i have fallen for you. im sorri i was secretly happi when sly's sis asked me if im yr gf...coz i'd be honoured to be with you. I see a future in us. I miss you. I onli prayed tht i could have had the chance, the wonderful opportunity, to get to know you better, and share my love with you.
But i've not been given the chance to love someone openly. the Lord hasnt granted it yet.

and she dreams again...

Class 95 Love songs...with simon...

and she dreams again...

Lord, I'm anxious, I'm scared. Please, let me know everything is olrite. Please, calm me down.

I have been on the run too much. I'm always worried for this and tht. I'm always anxious and i'm starting to realise it isn't quite normal. I walk fast, I eat fast, i dunnoe what else, but i'm always in this mode, wuick, quick, chop chop.

im beginning to realise I'm feeling very uptight recently. it's becoming more evident. I try to relaz my muscles, but it doesnt help.....oh lord, pls help me.

gd nite everyone. i'm gonna try to sleep, if possible. i hope it wont be another sleepless nite.

come to me....end this circus life, i dont want the clowns...i dont want to see you onlin in my dreams...baby, come back....i want my angel...

and she dreams again...

I'm fucking scared. Some bitch seems to be taunting my life. fuck. Stay thye hell away from my friends and my dear. fuck. shit man, of all people, just leave _____alone.

God, please, may your will be done. May your angels keep me safe. May you and your angels watch over us. please. Nothing must go wrong. pls.

My broadband died for three days. technician repaired it last nite. Now, my comp has crashed, or died. some memory failure, some virus shit, and I'm only free to be home on thursday to get it fixed. now using dad's comp and i've nothing in here. What's worse, my HD has all my impt FILES. we're tokin abt songs, photos, loads of them, word docs...shitsssss.

Help me pls.
I miss you. I hope you trust me. I feel i've lost you, and i'm like onli a friend to you. Shit la, i'm damn tired, so, i'm gonna slp now. Not feeling well at all.

Have mercy on us lord, may no harm come upon us. Becoz I believe .

and she dreams again...


Faithfully
by Journey

Highway run
Into the midnight sun
Wheels go 'round and 'round
You're on my mind
Restless hearts
Sleep alone tonight
Sendin' all my love
Along the wire

They say that the road
Ain't no place to start a family
Right down the line
It's been you and me
And lovin' a music man
Ain't always what it's s'posed to be
Oh girl, you stand by me
I'm forever yours
Faithfully

Circus life
Under the big top world
We all need the clowns
To make us smile
Through space and time
Always another show
Wondering where I am
Lost without you

And being apart ain't easy
On this love affair
Two strangers learn
To fall in love again
I get the joy
Of rediscovering you
Oh girl, you stand by me
I'm forever yours
Faithfully

---------------------

Three Doors Down – Here Without You

A hundred days had made me older
since the last time that I've saw your pretty face

A thousand lights had made me colder and I don't think I can look at this the same

But all the miles had separate
They disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby
but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin as the people either way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated but I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go it gets hard but it won't take away my love And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done it get hard but it won't take away my love

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

------------

I miss you, dear.

and she dreams again...

Sometimes I feel restrained and stiffled, by rules that are good for me, i have to abide but i wish i could just be free and do it coz i want to. There are people i wana spend more time with, but our schedulkes dont allow, anc it doesnt make things better when i cannot see them after a certain hour. im quite sick of having this "worry" that is always weighed on me. I know no matter what it's no point toking abt it, coz the folks wont understand. There are things i just dont bother and cant be bothered to raise up to them. I dont like being 19, but having to be 15. enuff worries, please. I have to learn sooner or later rite? It makes things difficult, and everytime smth is brewing for me, it doesnt last long....coz there's a hold on me. how long can i hide anyway? i wana go after my own happiness, my own fun, my own dreams. That's probably the only thing they're ok with. fuck la, i just feel shitty now. im at hoem today, not out, and guess wad folks? yes, you're rite. it's "that". so i decided to sleep till afternoon since i was having such a bad nite anyway. And i cant tell them i dont sleep well, coz i cry, or tht i wana be alone in my dream world, so tht i wun think abt things, or tht i get nitemares abt some of my greatest fears. So i just say i dont sleep well. They're not tht young anymore, so im oblidged more than ever to worry for their well being, and hence, i'd help out more than ever, but you can be sure i dont like it. argh.

sorry for ranting like a spolit, deprived child. im just very upset. oh i hope orli, sly daph, taufik make it thru...